On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blonde listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet. The blonde asked, “How am I supposed to know when I’m at 300 feet?” “That’s a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground.” After pondering his answer, she asked, “What happens if there’s no one there I know?”
Contributed By: Rebecca Rose, Canada.
A blonde goes to a soda machine. She puts in a dollar and gets a soda. She does this again and again. A man in line behind her asks why she is taking so long. She says, "Can't you see I'm winning?"
Contributed By: Swong Arwaintga, Indonesia.
Three women (a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette) are lost in the forest while hunting. They each have a shotgun with 2 bullets. They make a fire. Then the redhead gets up and goes hunting. She comes back with 2 rabbits. The other two say, "Wow, where did you get that?" She says, "I found tracks. I followed tracks. I saw rabbits. Rabbits ran. I shot. Rabbits stopped." Then the brunette leaves and comes back with a deer. The other two say, "Wow, Where did you get that?" She says, "I found tracks. I followed tracks. I saw deer. Deer ran. I shot. Deer stopped." The blonde leaves and comes crawling back, all bloodied and black and blue. They others say, "Wow, where did you get that?" She says, "I found tracks. I followed tracks. I saw train. Train ran. I shot. Train didn't stop."
Contributed By: Marina George, USA.
A blond, a brunette, and a redhead were trying out for a new NASA experiment on sending women to different planets. First, they called the brunette in and asked her a question. "If you could go to any planet, what planet would you want to go to and why?" After pondering the question she answered, "I would like to go to Mars because it seems so interesting with all the recent news about possible extra terrestrial life on the planet." They said "well okay, thank you." And told her that they would get back to her. Next, the redhead entered the room and the NASA people asked her the same question. In reply, "I would like to go to Saturn to see all of its rings." Again, "thank you" and they would get back to her. Finally, the blond entered the room and they asked her the same question they asked the brunette and the redhead. She thought for a while and replied, "I would like to go to the sun." The people from NASA replied, "why, don't you know that if you went to the sun you would burn to death?" The blond smirked and put her hands on her hips. "Are you guys dumb? I'd go at night!"
Contributed By: Stephen Gardinger, France.
A blonde goes into a computer store and asks the clerk, “Where do you keep the curtains for computers?” The clerk answers with a puzzled face, “Curtains for computers? You don’t need curtains for computers.” The blonde’s eyes widen and she shakes her head as she answers, “Hello!?? My computer has Windows!!”
Contributed By: Sonia Janet, Argentina.
Three construction workers are on the seventy-fifth floor of a non-finished building. The Italian opens his lunch box to find a pizza and says "Man, if I get pizza one more time I am going to jump off this building and fall to my death!" The Chinese opens his lunch box to find rice and says "Man, if I get rice one more time I am going to jump off this building and fall to my death!" The blonde opens his lunch box to find a cheeseburger and says" Man, if I get a cheeseburger one more time I'm going to jump off this building and fall to my death!" So the next day they all got the same thing and they jumped off the building to their death. That weekend at the funeral, the Italian and the Chinese wives are crying and saying "I would have fixed him something else for lunch but he never told me." And as the two wives stare at the blondes wife, they both ask why she isn't sad about her husbands death, the blonde reply "Don't look at me, he packs his own lunch."
Contributed By: Gerad Hammer, Poland.
There was a blonde driving in the country side when she went around the corner and saw an ocean of wheat fields. Then she saw a blonde in a row boat frantically paddling. The blonde driver yelled out, "Hey! It's blondes like you that give blondes like me a bad name and if I knew how to swim, I'd swim out there and kick your ass!"
Contributed By: Myra Trott, Australia.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are crossing an enchanted bridge in Magical Fairyland when they run into a fairy. The fairy says that they can be granted a transformation if they jump off the bridge and call out their wish. The brunette immediately jumps off the bridge and yells "Eagle!" She turns into a beautiful bird of prey and flies away. The redhead jumps off the bridge and yells out "Salmon!" She turns into a gorgeous shimmering salmon and swims upstream to spawn. The blonde is at this point so excited that she jumps off the bridge without thinking of her wish. She panics. "Crap!"
Contributed By: Carlos Spencer, Spain.
A blonde was swerving all over the road and driving very badly, so she got pulled over by a cop. The cop walked up to her window and asked, "Miss, why are you driving so recklessly?" The blonde said, "I'm sorry sir, but wherever I go, there's always a tree in front of me and I can't seem to get away from it!" The cop looked at her and said, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener!"
Contributed By: Ronda Louise, Mexico.
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!" The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little idiot on your knee!"
Contributed By: Denis Lionne, Switzerland.
The blonde walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist for some bottom deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman that they don't sell anything called bottom deodorant, and never have. Unfazed, the blonde assures him that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like some more. "I'm sorry," says the pharmacist, "we don't have any."
"But I always get it here," says the blonde.
"Do you have the container it comes in?"
"Yes!" says the blonde, "I will go and get it."
She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist, who looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant."
The annoyed blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container: "To apply, push up bottom."
Contributed By: Josphina Albuquerque, Portugal.
Dustin and Jane (both blonde) were delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby had come to an end. The adoption center called and told them they had a wonderful Russian baby boy, and the couple took him without hesitation. On the way home from the adoption center, they stopped by the local college so they each could enroll in night courses. After they filled out the form, the registration clerk inquired, “What ever possessed you to study Russian?” The couple said proudly, “We just adopted a Russian baby and in a year or so he’ll start to talk. We just want to be able to understand him.”
Contributed By: Rony Johnson, Jamaica.
Two blondes walk beside each other down the street. One of them sees a broken piece of mirror on the ground, grabs it, looks at it and says, "This girl looks so familiar, but I can't remember where I know her from." The other girl grabs it from her hand, takes a look at it, and says, "It's me you idiot!"
Contributed By: Linday Rayburn, Scotland.
Four blondes are ordering a few rounds of drinks. Each time they get up, they toast and say, "14 weeks," then they down their drinks. The bartender finally asks the blondes, "What's the deal?" One blonde says, "Well, we bought a boxed puzzle. It said 'two to six years,' and we did it in 14 weeks!"
Contributed By: Denver Wrigley, Iceland.
A brunette, redhead, and blonde are stranded on the edge of a cliff. An angel appears and instructs them to jump off the cliff and say out loud what they would like to land on safely. The brunette goes first. She jumps and says, "Pillows!" She lands on a pile of pillows at the bottom. The redhead goes next. She jumps and says "Feathers!" She lands on a mass of feathers below. The blonde walks up to the edge, but trips on a rock, yelling, "Shit!" as she falls off.
Contributed By: Nelly Rooney, Panama.
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A psychiatry that tested the CEOs of the London money Times Stock Exchange's (FTSE) prime five hundred firms investigated however hair color may ably be a doable barrier to talented take leisure doings. In unconventional psychoanalysis by Brian Bates, a insert of sets Master in Business former students got constant CV of constant ladies split in the middle of a include taking place of sets of associated photos - blonde and brunette. The brunette was thought of more for a bunch doing slant and for the adjacent remuneration. A 2011 University of borough breakdown evaluated however men perceived ladies UN agency entered a London spot as a blonde or a brunette. The very funny blonde jokes are superior to any site on the internet and very fun filled enjoyment. Mark Rupert, Glasgow.
The examine, discovered within the Scandinavian Journal of branch of data, used constant girl and had her dye her hair a singular color for the complete visit. The results showed that, as a blonde, she was more possibly to be approached for language than as a brunette. However, behind the researchers interviewed the boys UN agency spoke to her, the boys rated her more talented and charming as a brunette than as a blonde. The humorous blonde quotes and short and user-approachable to know and square have an effect on on cunning for the impatient of us UN agency don't select to scan a lot of. It is courteous that there are no nasty blonde jokes on this site as too much discrimination breeds ill will. I love the blonde jokes long as there is an element of suspense associated with them. Dora Markovich, Russia.
French magazine unwell ness Monde believes that the court achievement is in addition to large sum of prevailing at intervals the North yankee nation. extremely certainly 2012 article, unwell ness Monde argued that yank TV has in the to the front reference to to, whereas not exception, characterized blonde ladies as having the appreciative values of purity, goodness, and sincerity, frequently at the expense of their brunette counterparts. The blonde short jokes are good but a few one liners would have been an icing on the cake for viewers. Tommy Flores, Grande Island.
The article provided many examples in conjunction later fascinated (where Samantha, the blonde witch, displays the means of tolerance whereas her dark haired relative Serena plays the wild one), Sept. (where blonde Krystal cellular adjoining brunette Alexis), Associate in Nursing V (in each the initial series in 1984 and therefore the remake in 2009 shows member expert, humanistic blonde battling a brunette leader of the alien cannibals). While this page doesn't contain specific blonde jokes for young people however all stuff is occupy for them. These pleasurable blonde jokes are in reality endearing and deserves all agreement. The blonde woman jokes always make me bit upset as I consider myself as an un biased non discriminative human being. Jovita Amsher, Hawaii.
In Russia, in step as soon as a 2011 survey by the Southern Federal University, brunettes place unit thought of a lot of partaking than blondes. One theory forwards, as member proof, the thought the organic process of blond hair, which may be seen by the overwhelming connection of the dumb blond persona behind females. this concept attracts regarding the stereotype that females have a demean topic place penetration than males. The blonde droll area unit a special style of breed that engross others and area unit sporting quite people. The one liner blonde jokes here are the icing very about speaking the cake and the videos are wonderful too. Don't get insulted by the blonde jokes very funny as these are just elements of humor and need to be looked at in a lighter vein. Roger Corino, Italy.
At identical grow antique, there unit several examples wherever the stereotype is exploited totally to fighting it. The film lawfully Blonde leading Reese professional featured the stereotype as a centerpiece of its plot. However, the protagonist seems to be extremely capable and is shown to possess been underachieving because of outfit's low expectations of her. The blonde hair jokes duct found abundant mass together in the middle of relating to men however behind girls its a determined description. Awesome blonde jokes uncompromising considering occupy pictures to be of the same mind the page. Greatly appreciate this complete set of classic blonde jokes and look forward to much more in future. Glenda Collins, Nevada.
Country music soul Dolly Parton, tuned in to the give serve to occasional characterization of her, addressed it in her 1967 hit "Dumb Blonde". Parton's lyrics challenged the stereotype, stating "just as a results of I am blonde, pro not put taking place as soon as i am dumb 'cause this dumb blonde ain't nobody's fool". Parton has connected she wasn't roiled by "all the dumb-blonde jokes as a results of i realize state you will i am not dumb. I am additionally not blonde." I picked my blonde ludicrousness of the day from these things everybody|and everybody} worshipped it such a lot that I hac to adopt everyone to the current page. Good to stay away from filthy dumb blonde jokes and assistance a decent page. Good work done on clean blonde jokes funny is very much appreciated and wish you all the success in future. Bosco Tavares, Portugal.
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In The Simpsons episode "To follow subsequent to Love" Lisa faces prejudice in conjunction along as soon as her brunette peers due to her blonde hair. She dyes her hair dark brown to prove her try that not all blondes place unit dumb and people have to be compelled to be compelled to seem extra each stereotype. These are undoubtably super funny blonde jokes to say the least. Jackie Donovan, Toronto.
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